The Shadows

I have not written any poetry in quite sometime.  I decided I need to practice some prose and work on the voices inside of a poem that has either a story or perspective.  This is probably some of the worst work I have done in a long time but if you like awesome.  If not well we share a similar disinterest :)

The Shadows - Sacif

As I rest my head upon the shadows
A thought runs through my mind of a time that once was
Broken dreams of a long love lost
I call unto the shadows
Take me

As I walk with the shadows
What I am now I can never be or will be again
A shattered resemblance of a broken man
Torn by the grief of time and loss
I called unto the shadows
Take me

Broken and torn upon the shadows
My longing and ache are as much of me as I once was
I long for the days before the shadow
But I called upon the shadows
And in the shadows I shall be

Maybe I am just not meant to understand.

For the past couple of months I have been running a bit of a social experiment.  That social experiment is called "trying to get a girlfriend" and the results are not impressive.  Not because I am having trouble finding a girl I can be with but better yet trying to find someone who is not pushing the drama meter into the red.

Lets start with subject 1.  A social butterfly and self proclaimed bitch who has nothing better to do than to drink and cry over the troubles that plague her life.  I am astonished to think that so much effort can be afforded to whining about how shitty someones life is or how someone is treating this sad individual.  I decided to play it slow.  I liked this girl and yet a part of me (probably the rational side) kept telling me "don't do it, bitch is crazy, don't do it, I'm fucking warning you."

I did it.

The end result is humorous to say the least.  First of all I don't know if I am a mystery to the universe or if people just see me as more complicated than I am.  I offered to go out to dinner, have basic conversation and see where life took us.  Had a nice plan all laid out about how everything should go and of course when dealing with people of the opposite gender everything gets straight slung the fuck sideways.  All of a sudden I hear I am some raging pervert who wants to stick my Johnsonville into everyone's bratwurst.   Guffawed I attempt to clear the air and figure out what the fuck just happened with no result.

I thought it was over so I cut my losses and just stopped talking to this person.  About 2 months later we meet up again.  I am shit faced hammered and we start talking and one thing leads to another and we are booking a room at a Comfort Inn.  Now in my mind I'm trying to figure out what the fuck is going on and the overall experience was so confusing and weird that I of course threw all judgment to the wind and did the deed with this person who already had concerns about my integrity..proved her right I guess.

The next morning after the drink wore off and my mind started working again I thought it would be best to try and do...something...I mean, what the fuck do you do when you just did what I did under those circumstances.  So I asked a very basic question.  "Do you like me?" The response was a yes so I thought I just hit a home run, mind you I had been crushing on this girl for some time so I was ecstatic.

Until....that week.  Once away from each other the weirdness came back.  My calls and texts went unanswered.  Me thinking rationally again I thought it would be nice to go out and talk about what happened.  But no go we decided to just stay friends and all is now as they say history.  However I still find it quite humorous that in a way she did to me exactly what she was afraid that i was going to do to her.  Ironic? Maybe.  Just a drunk bitch needing a lay? More than likely but of course I end up being the asshole..gotta love it.

Eventually I shall chronicle all of my resent findings when trying to attract/appease/bargain with the opposite sex but for now I shall leave it at this.

Best recap of E3 2010. Thanks PA you never fail to please :)

War for Cybertron Demo

 
This weekend I was finally able to get my hands on some Transformers: War for Cybertron multiplayer action. I have to admit I did not have high hopes for this game when I first heard the announcement of its existence. I was expecting robot on robot action done with mediocrity and only the Transformer name-value in mind. Even when I saw trailors I had to resist the urge to become excited since I have seen pretty trailors before where the end result was lacking in originality and/or fun (Too Human comes to mind).

So it is with a happy heart that I can say that the multiplayer demo has surprised me with its awesomeness. There was only one playable map (Meltdown) and two playable classes (Soldier and Scout) with limited customability for each. This was honestly the only negative aspect of the demo for me. I wanted to be able to play with more of the toys that they have in store when the game finally releases.

The soldier was my first and current favorite choice for some robot on robot on action. I prefer heavy hitters to the small and quick bastards . I started off with a mini gun and a rocket launcher as my loadout and there were only 2 options available for "special abilities" the first of which being able to swing a big metal club around your head.

All classes get a melee ability, the soldier gets a big mace looking thing and the scouts get what looks like an energy sword. Let's just say the whirlwind helped me get an easy 3 kills when I found myself in the middle of combat. The other ability is the ability to hover around on jets for a limited time (yawn).

Of course each class gets a vehicle type assigned to it. This is f'ing transformers after all right? The soldier wheels around in tank form while the zip zooming scout gets to cruise around as a little race car. Both are very awkward to control at first but once there is some room to roam around in the controls become easier. Corridors sucked in vehicle form. This may be due to the fact that I abhor racing games and utterly suck at them.

The graphics are average. Nothing to write home about but at the same time the explosions and designs are what you would expect from a Transformers game. During combat I noticed very little slow down and everything was very smooth. The only aspect I hope that they change is the level of detail while in vehicle form. They didn't look bad but at the same time you would think they would expound on the coolness a bit more.

Overall I am very happy with what this game is turning out to be. I was going to wait for some reviews prior to purchase but after getting a taste and hearing more about the campaign modes this has definately been bumped up to launch day purchase (well at least close to launch day)

~Sacif~